A little boy walked down the beach, and as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand. He walked up to her and asked, “Are you a Christian?”
“Yes.”.
“Do you read your Bible every day?”
She nodded her head, “Yes.”
Do you pray often?” the boy asked next, and again she answered, “Yes.”
With that he asked his final question, “Will you hold my quarter while I go swimming?”
The author has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature, landscapes and studying native cultures. Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt, the Canary Islands, much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hardcover and Ebooks, and contact information: please check his website, http://www.journeysthrulife.com.
Your comments appreciated
There has been much debate over the years about what the founding fathers meant about the separation of church and state. In recent times there has been much disinformation about how they actually believed, especially George Washington. In this short Ebook the author tries to explain how they actually felt.
A young Scottish lad and lassie were sitting on a low stone wall, holding hands, and just gazing out over the loch.
For several minutes they sat silently, then finally the girl looked at the boy and said, “A penny for your thoughts, Angus.”
“Well, uh, I was thinkin’ perhaps it’s aboot time for a wee kiss.”
The girl blushed, then leaned over and kissed him. Then he blushed. Then the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch.
After a while the girl spoke again. “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.”
“Well, uh, I was thinkin’ perhaps its aboot time for a wee cuddle.”
The girl blushed, then leaned over and cuddled him. Then he blushed. Then the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch.
After a while the girl spoke again. “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.”
“Well, uh, I was thinkin’ perhaps its aboot time you let me poot me hand on your leg.”
The girl blushed, then took his hand and put it on her leg. Then he blushed. Then the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch.
After a while the girl spoke again. “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.”
The young man knit his brow. “Well, now,” he said, “my thoughts are a bit more serious this time.”
“Really?” said the girl in a whisper, filled with anticipation.
“Aye,” said the lad.
The girl looked away in shyness, began to blush and bit her lip in anticipation of the ultimate request.
Angus blurted out, “Din’na ye think it’s aboot time ye paid me the first three pennies?”
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature, landscapes and studying native cultures. Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt, the Canary Islands, much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hardcover and Ebooks, and contact information: please check his website, http://www.journeysthrulife.com.
Your comments appreciated
The wisdom of our ancestors
There is an extreme shortage of common sense in today’s world, I often think back to what my parents and grandparents believed and said, at the time I thought they were totally out of their mind and ignored it. I now wish I would have listened and followed their advice more often. It is in this light I have decided to publish some of my random thoughts based on the views of our ancestors.
Timmy was a little five year old boy that his Mom loved very much and, being a worrier, she was concerned about him walking to school when he started Kindergarten. She walked him to school the couple of days but when he came home one day, he told his mother that he did not want her walking him to school everyday. He wanted to be like the “big boys.”
He protested loudly,so she had an idea of how to handle it.
She asked a neighbor, Mrs. Goodnest, if she would surreptitiously follow her son to school, at a distance behind him that he would not likely notice, but close enough to keep a watch on him. Mrs. Goodnest said that since she was up early with her toddler anyway, it would be a good way for them to get some exercise as well so she agreed.
The next school day, Mrs. Goodnest and her little girl, Marcy, set out following behind Timmy as he walked to school with another neighbor boy he knew. She did this for the whole week.
As the boys walked and chatted, kicking stones and twigs, the little friend of Timmy noticed that this same lady was following them as she seemed to do every day all week. Finally, he said to Timmy, “Have you noticed that lady following us all week? Do you know her?”
Timmy nonchalantly replied, “Yea, I know who she is.”
The little friend said, “Well who is she?”
“That’s just Shirley Goodnest” Timmy said.
“Shirley Goodnest? Who is she and why is she following us?”
“Well,” Timmy explained, “every night my Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm with my prayers ‘cuz she worries about me so much. And in it, the prayer psalm says, “Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life,” so I guess I’ll just have to get used to it.”
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website, http://www.journeysthrulife.com.
Your comments appreciated
There has been much debate over the years about what the founding fathers meant about the separation of church and state. In recent times there has been much disinformation about how they actually believed, especially George Washington. In this short Ebook the author tries to explain how they actually felt.
1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
7. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife’s infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy! comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.
12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. travelling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
15. They lived in a typical suburban neighbourhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.
16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
18. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
23. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
26. Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
27. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
28. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com
Your comments appreciated
Make money doing what you love
This informative Ebook describes alternative methods of making money ,often a full time income in photography even if you have no desire to shoot wedding photography. this book gives examples and websites where you can use your photos to supply you with an income, not only to enable you to buy new equipment, but a living income as well.
Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name.
No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting on them hand and foot.
You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.
Even if you tell jokes as well as Jay Leno, neither your cat nor your teen will ever crack a smile.
No cat or teenager shares your taste in music.
Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end without moving, barely breathing.
Cats are said to have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did, too.
Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner — communicating that ultimate human ecstasy: a sense of complete and utter boredom.
Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone’s furniture.
Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your bedroom. Teenagers are definitely not above that sort of behavior.
Thus, if you must raise teenagers, the best sources of advice are not other parents, but veterinarians. It is also a good idea to keep a guidebook on cats at hand at all times. And remember, above all else, put out the food and do not make any sudden moves in their direction. When they make up their minds, they will finally come to you for some affection and comfort, and it will be a triumphant moment for all concerned.
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com
Your comments appreciated
Throughout man’s long history on earth,there has been one group of people who have carried the torch of liberty and freedom throughout the ages , from time immemorial until the present day. In these days their counsel is need more than ever.
Supposedly true excerpts of kids’ Sunday School letters to God.
Dear God:
In Sunday School they told us what you do. Who does it when you are on vacation?
How did you know you were God?
I read the Bible. What does begat mean? Nobody will tell me. Love, Allison
On Halloween I am going to wear a Devil’s costume, is that all right with you?
Are you really invisible or is that just a trick?
Is it true my father won’t get into Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house?
Did you mean for giraffe to look like that or was it an accident?
Who draws the lines around the countries?
Do animals get to use you too or is there someone else for them?
I went to this wedding and they kissed right in the church … is that OK?
I like the Lord’s Prayer the best of all. Did you have to write it a lot or did you get it right the first time? I have to write everything I ever write over again.
God, it’s OK that you made different religions but don’t you get mixed up sometimes?
Did they really talk that fancy in Bible times?
I would like to know why all the things you said are in red?
Is Reverend Coe a friend of yours or do you just know him through the business?
Did you really mean do unto others as they do unto you, because if you did then I’m going to fix my brother.
My grandpa says you were around when he was a little boy. How far back DO you go?
I know all about where babies come from. I think. From inside mommies and daddies put them there. Where are they before that? Do you have them in Heaven? How do they get down here? Do you have to take care of them all first? Please answer all my questions…I always think of you. Yours Truly, Susan
Thank you for the baby brother but what I prayed for was a puppy.
Please put another holiday between Christmas and Easter. There is nothing good in there now.
Why is Sunday School on Sunday? I thought it was suppose to be our day of rest.
I wish you would not make it so easy for people to come apart. I had 3 stitches and a shot.
If we come back as something, please don’t let me be Jennifer Horton, because I hate her. Thank You. Love, Denise
Please send Dennis Clark to a different camp this year.
Maybe Cain and Abel would not kill each other so much if they had their own rooms. It works with my brother.
I want to be just like my Daddy when I get big but not with so much hair all over.
I keep waiting for Spring but it never comes yet. Please don’t forget.
I think the stapler is on of your greatest inventions.
I bet it is very hard for you to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I can never do it.
Of all the people who work for you, I like Peter and John the best.
My brother told me about being born but it sure doesn’t sound right.
If you watch in church on Sunday, I will show you my new shoes.
I like the story about Chanuka the best of all of them. You really made up some good ones!!
I would like to live for 900 years like the guy in the bible.
We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school they said you did it. So, I bet he stole your idea.
If you would of let the dinosaurs not extinct we would not have a country…I think you did the right thing.
It is great the way you always get the stars in the Right places.
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com
A father asks his son, age 10, if he knows about the birds and the bees.
“I don’t want to know!” the child said, bursting into tears.
Confused, the father asked his son what was wrong.
“Oh dad,” he sobbed, “at age six I got the ‘there’s no Santa’ speech. At age seven I got the ‘there’s no Easter bunny’ speech. Then at age 8 you hit me with the ‘there’s no tooth fairy’ speech! If you’re going to tell me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com
The teacher says to her new class, “For our first lesson, each of you will stand up, tell us your name, say what your father does, spell what your father does, and then explain it to us. All right, Billy. You go first.”
Billy stands up and says, “My name’s Billy. My father’s a lawyer, l-a-w-y-e-r, and he defends people in court.”
The teacher says, “Very good. All right, Benjamin.”
Benjamin stands up and says, “My name’s Benjamin. My father’s a pharmacist, f-a-m… f-a-r-n… f-n….”
The teacher says, “Benjamin, you go home tonight and learn how to spell pharmacist. Angelo, you’re next.”
Angelo stands up and says, “My name’s Angelo. My old man’s a bookie, b-o-o-k-i-e, and if he was here, he’d give you even-money odds Benjamin ain’t spellin’ pharmacist by tomorrow.”
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com
One day at the end of class, little Johnny’s teacher gives the students homework: think of a story and then tell the moral of that story.
The next day Johnny tells his story:
“My dad fought in the Vietnam War. His plane was shot down over enemy territory. He jumped out before it crashed with only a case of beer, a machine gun, and a machete. On the way down, he drank the case of beer.
“Unfortunately, he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. He shot 70 with his machine gun. But he ran out of bullets, so he pulled out his machete and killed 20 more. But the blade on his machete broke, so he killed the last ten with his bare hands.”
The teacher, stunned with shock at the story, asks Johnny what could possibly be the moral to his story.
Johnny replies, “Don’t mess with my dad when he’s been drinking.”
Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!
He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.
For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com
Your comments appreciated
In today’s world, many resort to abusing drugs and alcohol, why are so many becoming addicted and not only destroying their lives but the lives of others around them as well?
During a performance for the high school
drama class at the local
theatre, a hole was cracked in the stage floor. Subsequent acts managed
to avoid the damaged area until little Freddy, juggling bowling pins,
accidentally stepped through the hole up to his
knee.
He apologized to the audience for his clumsiness. But a heckler in
the
back of the theatre shouted:
“Don’t worry, Freddy! It’s just a stage you’re going
through!”
Hoosier Hysteria 