A Marriage Made in Heaven

A Marriage Made in Heaven

On their way to a justice of the peace to get married, a couple has a fatal car accident. The couple is sitting outside heaven’s gate waiting for St. Peter to admit them. While waiting, they wonder if they could possibly get married in Heaven. St. Peter finally shows up and they ask him.

St. Peter says, “I don’t know, this is the first time anyone has ever asked. Let me go find out,” and he leaves.

The couple sits waiting for two months and begins to wonder if they really should get married in Heaven, what with the eternal aspect of it all. “What if it doesn’t work out?” they wondered. “Are we stuck together forever?”

St. Peter finally returns after yet another month, looking somewhat bedraggled. “Yes,” he informs the couple. “You can get married in Heaven.”

“Great,” says the couple. “But what if things don’t work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?”

St. Peter, red-faced, slams his clipboard onto the ground.

“What’s wrong?” exclaims the frightened couple.

“Come on!” St. Peter exclaims. “It took me three months to find a priest up here! Do you have any idea how long it’s going to take me to find a lawyer?

 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

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The Donkey in the Well

The Donkey in the Well

One day a farmer’s donkey fell down into a well that the farmer had accidentally left uncovered. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway, so it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey.

He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer’s neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a stepping stone . We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Now, most people think that’s the end, but it isn’t.

The donkey later came back and bit the hell out of the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected, and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock.

So the real moral from today’s lesson?

When you do something wrong and try to cover your ass, it always comes back to bite you.

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Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

schoolhouse

There’s Always Room

There’s Always Room….

A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a large jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks about 2″ in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The students laughed as the professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

“Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this is your life . The rocks are the important things — your family, your partner,your health, your children — things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff.”

There was total silence as the students absorbed the lesson.

“If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal.”

The students started nodding in agreement at the professor’s profound wisdom.

“Take care of the rocks first,” the professor finished — “the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”

But then…

A student then took the jar which the other students and the professor agreed was full, and proceeded to pour in a bottle of beer –and then another! Of course the beer filled the remaining spaces within the jar making the jar truly full.

The moral of this tale is:

That no matter how full your life is, there is always room for beer or two.

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 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

alcohol

In today’s world, many resort to abusing drugs and alcohol, why are so many becoming addicted and not only destroying their lives but the lives of others around them as well?

 

Important Women’s Health Issue

Important Women’s Health Issue

Shared by a (female!) friend.

– – –

  • Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
  • Do you suffer from shyness?
  • Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
  • Do you suffer exhaustion from the day to day grind?
  • If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

    Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you’re ready and willing to do just about anything . You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

    Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

    Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn’t mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

    Side Effects May Include

    – Dizziness
    – Nausea
    – Vomiting
    – Incarceration
    – Loss of motor control
    – Loss of clothing
    – Loss of money
    – Table dancing
    – Headache
    – Dehydration
    – Dry mouth
    – And a desire to sing Karaoke

    Warnings

  • The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
  • The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
  • The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing.
  • The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
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The Trucker and the Lawyer

The Trucker and The Lawyer

A truck driver amused himself by running over lawyers as they walked
down the side of the road. Every time he saw a lawyer walking along the
road, he would swerve to hit him. There would be a loud “thud”, and then
he would swerve back on the road.

As the truck driver drove along one day, he saw a priest hitch hiking,
he pulled over and asked the priest, “Where are you going, Father?”

The priest said he was on his way to his church up the road.

“I’ll give you a lift.”

The priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver
continued down the road . Suddenly, the truck driver saw a lawyer walking
down the road and instinctively swerved to hit him. At the last minute,
he remembered he had a priest in the truck and swerved back onto the
road. Even though he knew he missed the lawyer, he still heard a loud
“thud.” Unsure of where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors.
When he didn’t see anything, he turned to the priest and said, “I’m
sorry, Father. I almost hit a lawyer.”

The priest replied, “That’s OK, I got him with the door.”

Huge Selection of Watches 125 x 125 v2

 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

The wisdom of our ancestors

The wisdom of our ancestors

Steve Gets Killed

Steve Gets Killed

Three guys were working on a high rise building project: Steve, Bill and Charlie. Steve falls off and is killed instantly.

As the ambulance takes the body away, Charlie says, “Someone should go and tell his wife.”

Bill says, “OK, I`m pretty good at that sensitive stuff , I`ll do it.” 2 hours later, he comes back carrying a 6-pack.

Charlie says, “Where did you get that, Bill?” “Steve`s wife gave it to me.”

“That`s unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and she gave you the beer?”

Bill says,”Well not exactly. When she answered the door, I said to her, `You must be Steve`s widow.`”

She said, “`No, I`m not a widow.”

And I said, “Wanna bet me a six-pack?”

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MR.BEER® Home Brewing Kits. American's #1 Home Brewing System. Makes a great gift!