Politically Correct Ways to Say Someone is Stupid

These are some of my favorites

A few clowns short of a
circus.
*
A few fries short of a happy meal.
*
The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead.

*
All foam, no beer.
*
The butter has slipped off his pancake.
*
The cheese slid off his cracker.
*
Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel.
*
Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they
appear.
*
Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the
heel.
*
He fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way
down.
*
As smart as bait.
*
Doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash.
*
Her sewing machine’s out of thread.
*
One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.
*
Her antenna doesn’t pick up all the channels.
*
His belt doesn’t go through all the loops.
*
Receiver is off the hook.
*
Not wired to code.
*
Skylight leaks a little.
*
Her slinky’s kinked.
*
Too much yardage between the goal posts.
*
Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them
together.
*
A photographic memory, but the lens cover is on.
*
Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t
coming.
*
Is so dense, light bends around her.
*
If brains were taxed, he’d get a rebate.
*
Standing close to her, you can hear the ocean.
*
Some folks drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just
gargled

Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean, and studied Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different cultures!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has studied and applied what he has learned to solving the many issues facing not only the United States, but the world as well.

Common Sense solutions to complex problems.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks, please check his website.http://www.commonsensejourneys.com

 

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Sweet Revenge

Sweet Revenge

Many of you are aware that the US Supreme
Court ruled that the state of Missouri cannot discriminate against the
Ku Klux Klan when it comes to groups that want to participate in the
adopt-a-highway program.

While seeing the name of the Klan on a
highway sign is aesthetically
disgusting, most realized that this decision was victory for free speech
andequal protection under the law.

Well, the Department of Transportation
in Missouri has gotten its legal
revenge, and boy is it sweet. True, they can’t remove the KKK’s
adopt-a-highway sign, but no one would dispute the state’s right to name
the highway itself.

The KKK is now regularly cleaning up a
stretch of the newly christened
Rosa Parks Freeway!

AND YOU THOUGHT GOD DID NOT HAVE A SENSE
OF HUMOR

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Politically Correct Descriptions of Men

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• He does not have a beer gut …He has developed a liquid grain storage facility.
•  
• He is not a bad dancer …He is overly caucasian.
  
• He does not get lost all the time …He investigates alternative destinations. 

 The Mayan Calendar and the transformation of consciousness

• He is not balding …He is in follicle regression.
• He is not a cradle robber …He prefers generationally differential relationships.
• He does not get falling-down drunk …He becomes accidentally horizontal.
• He does not act like a total ass …He develops a case of rectal-cranial inversion.
• He is not a male chauvinist pig …He has swine empathy.
• He is not afraid of commitment …He is monogamously challenged.

• He is not horny …He is sexually focused.
• It’s not his crack you see when he bends over …It is male cleavage.

 

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 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

 

The wisdom of our ancestors

There is an extreme shortage of common sense in today’s world, When looking back in history, I soon discovered this has always been a problem, Benjamin Franklin once said, ”Of all the senses, common sense seems to be the one that is used the least.” As obvious as it may seem, many seem to be totally oblivious to it. Most, if not all of the problems the world faces today could be solved if people would just sit back and think about what would seem to be the most obvious and simple solution to any issue. Often times people tend to over complicate the issues. I often think back to what my parents and grandparents believed and said, at the time I thought they were totally out of their mind and ignored it. I now wish I would have listened and followed their advice. It is now evident they were a lot smarter than we gave them credit for. Many times, in today’s world, the schools and universities can no longer be counted on to teach truth and values that will guide someone through life.

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Leroy

 

The Social Worker

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids.

“Wow,” the social worker exclaims, “Are they all yours?!?”

“Yep, they are all mine,” the flustered momma sighs, having heard

that question a thousand times before. She says, “Sit down Leroy.” All
the children rush to find seats.

“Well,” says the social worker, “then you must be here to sign up. I’ll need all your children’s names.”

“This one’s my oldest: his name is Leroy.”

“OK, and who’s next?”

“Well, this one, he is Leroy, also.”

The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one,

through the oldest four, all boys, all are named Leroy. Then she is
introduced to the eldest girl, named Leigh Roy!

“All right…” says the caseworker, “I’m seeing a pattern here. Are they all named Leroy?”

Their Momma replied, “Well, yes — it makes it easier. When it is

time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, ‘Leroy!’ An’
when it’s time for dinner, I just yell ‘Leroy!’ an’ they all comes a
runnin.’ An ‘if I need to stop the kid who’s running into the street, I
just yell ‘Leroy’ and all of them stop. It’s the smartest idea I ever
had, namin’ them all Leroy.”

The social worker thinks this over for a bit and agrees, but then she

wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, “But what if you just want one kid to come, and not the whole bunch?”

“Oh, then I call them by their last names.”

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 The author has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

America is in serious trouble, many no longer realize what values and principles our country is founded on and have strayed from the common sense and creative thinking of our ancestors, how can we fix it?

 

 

The Worst Ethnic Joke Ever

The Worst Ethnic Joke Ever Told

As it’s not politically correct to direct a joke at any particular ethnic minority, try this one:

 

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri
Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canuck, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant.

“I’m sorry,” said the snooty maître d’, “but you can’t come in here without a Thai.”
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Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

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The informative Ebook describes alternative methods of making money, often a full-time income in photography even if you have no desire to shoot wedding photography. this book gives examples and websites where you can use your photos to supply you with an income, not only to enable you to buy new equipment but a living income as well.

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