Rules of Romance

Keep your beer cold photo
Keep your beer cold photo by lifejourneysimages
View other Sail Photography at Zazzle.com

Rules of
Romance

In the world of romance, one single rule
applies: Make the woman happy.
Do something she likes and you get points. Do something she dislikes
and points are subtracted. You don’t get any points for doing something she
expects…Sorry, that’s the way the game is played. Here is a guide to the
point system.

Simple Duties:
You make the bed…………………………………………..+1
You make the bed, but forget to add the decorative pillows………0
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets…………………..-1
You leave the toilet seat up………………………………..-5
You replace the toilet-paper roll when it’s empty………………0
When the toilet-paper roll is barren, you resort to Kleenex…….-1
When the Kleenex runs out you shuffle slowly to the next bathroom..-2
You go out to buy her spring-fresh extra-light panty liners with
wings..+5
But return with beer………………………………………-5
You check out a suspicious noise at night …………………0
You check out a suspicious noise and it’s nothing……………0
You check out a suspicious noise and it’s something………..+5
You pummel it with a six iron…………………………..+10
It’s her
father……………………………………….-10

Social Engagements
You stay by her side the entire party…..0
You stay by her side for a while, then leave
to chat with a college drinking buddy….-2
Named Tiffany……………….-4
Tiffany is a dancer………….-6
Tiffany has implants…………-8

Her Birthday
You take her out to dinner…………………………….0
You take her out to dinner and it’s not a sports bar ……+1
Okay, it is a sports bar……………………………..-2
And it’s all-you-can-eat night………………………..-3
It’s a sports bar, it’s all-you-can-eat night, and your face
is painted the colors of your favorite
team………………-10

A Night Out With The Boys
Go out with a pal …………………………………..-5
And the pal is happily married ……………………….-4
Or frighteningly single ……………………………..-7
And he drives a Mustang……………………………..-10
With a personalized license plate (GR8 N BED)
…………-15

A Night Out
You take her to a movie…………………………………..+2
You take her to a movie she likes………………………….+4
You take her to a movie you hate………………………….+6
You take her to a movie you like…………………………..-2
It’s called DeathCop 3……………………………………-3
Which features cyborgs having sex………………………….-9
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans
………-15

Your Physique
You develop a noticeable potbelly………………………….-15
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it….+10
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to loose jeans and baggy
Hawaiian shirts …………………………………-30
You say “I don’t give a damn because you have one
too”………-800

The Big Question
She asks, “Do I look fat?” ……………………………….-5
You hesitate in responding……………………………….-10
You reply,
“Where?”………………………………………-35

Communication
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying
what looks like a concerned expression…………………………..0
When she wants to talk, you listen, for over 30 minutes……….+5
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV…+10
She realizes this is because you’ve fallen
asleep……………-20

The book of Awakening


Art Prints

 

 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

alcohol

In today’s world, many resort to abusing drugs and alcohol, why are so many becoming addicted and not only destroying their lives but the lives of others around them as well?

 

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